Wednesday, 3 August 2016

BODY CONFIDENCE


There is no denying that after having your first child your body changes.  Things are wobblier, stretch marks appear and in some cases you feel more self conscious about your body than you ever did before.  That's how I feel at least.  I say feel because for me it's getting worse.  A huge portion of the problem is me, and my eating habits, which I know need to change, however it's bloody hard!  It's hard to change a habit of a lifetime and when you have the will power of a small child it doesn't make for a great recipe.

However, back in July we embarked on our first family holiday abroad.  In the lead up to the holiday I kept telling myself I'd lose weight, I'd be slimmer and I'd finally find the confidence to wear a bikini and feel good about it.  Needless to say none of those things happened and within the blink of an eye the holiday rolled around and I was still my usual size 14/16.  Prior to our holiday I picked up some bikinis, but on the Saturday before we left I returned them all and bought another swimsuit.  I resigned myself to the fact that a bikini wasn't for me this year and that I'd try again next year! 

We headed off on holiday and when we arrived the temperatures were soaring, almost into the 40's. On our first morning we headed to the pool, it was early and there were only a few of us up, we had the pick of sun loungers and I was feeling great about my swimsuit choice, I felt much more comfortable and it would be better for everyone, they wouldn't have to watch me truffle shuffle every time I went to the pool bar.  As the sun began to rise fully, the holiday makers began appearing and just before 11am the pool area was jam packed.

As I looked around the pool, I could hardly believe what I was seeing, there in front of me were women, lots of them, all shapes and sizes, ranging from size 6 to size 22+, AND they were all wearing bikini's! Every single one, I kid you not!  I was angry, angry at myself for taking back those bikini's.  As I looked around at these women I only saw one thing, beauty!  I can honestly say that I didn't feel one ounce of disgust, I felt empowered and proud of them. They didn't give two sh*ts what other's thought, they were wearing those bikini's with pride and not one was shying away from their own body!

The following day I took myself down to the beach where there were shops selling bikini's and I'm sure you can guess what happened, I bloody bought one!  I wore it several times throughout my holiday and I felt good!  Although I didn't know any of these women I felt at ease, it was like we had a mutual understanding.  It was ok to show of your body no matter what your size.  Having not been abroad in quite a while, I'm not sure if that's just how it is these days, but I have to say I liked it!  It also made me realise that body confidence starts with you!  Maybe some of the women by that pool had felt the same as me, in fact I can almost guarantee that they did, but they did something that I didn't, they embraced it!  On that first day I watch as those other mums flaunted their mum tums, and I just thought, well done you!

I'll never be miss world, I'll probably never be a size 8 but I'll do  my best to live a healthy life as much as I can, and I'll sure as hell make sure my suitcase is jam packed with bikini's from now on! 

E M B R A C E  Y O U R   B O D Y,   I T' S  T H E  O N L Y  O N E  Y O U' V E  G O T

Kirsty x



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